Make It Nasty

*Warning: the following content is intended for MATURE audiences only*

*Viewers discretion is advised* 

It's almost 2014 and men are STILL acting like pleasuring a woman down below is the equivalent to catching cooties! Fellas, I understand you don't want to be clowned by your homeboys but what you really don't want is one OF your homeboys doing some sh*t you ain't have the time for: e.g. eating your woman out. If you think, RIGHT NOW, some dude on Twitter or Facebook or Instagram, ain't pressuring your woman, to let him come over or vice versa, so he can watch Redbox movies eat your woman's vagina...you are sadly mistaken.

Maybe it's because you still ain't learn from Eat One, Teach One, pt. 1 or maybe it's because you're stuck on stupid or maybe it's because you're more concerned with your NBA/NFL fantasy team, to even bother with going down town and sending your woman to work happier than a kid on Christmas! Whatever your rationale is, I assure you, THIS piece right here, will help you out come sex time...period.

*class is in session*

The idea of part 2 is to make sure you as man, do everything in your powers, to insure a night/morning/afternoon of pure bliss...

and just be a down right freak!!!

Listen, if you're a family member or anything else along those lines...cut your loses now, stop reading, and get ready for Scandal

...because I'm bout to say some sh*t, that'll f*** your perception of me.

Eat It From The Back:

A lot of men are afraid to eat it from the back because the anus is pretty much RIGHT, THERE! Listen, if you're an adult, you should KNOW where that hole is; so don't get behind her and lick all crazy or 8/10 your tongue WILL enter that hole. There isn't a woman alive who doesn't like her p**** ate from the back! Here's what you do fellas: have her come over to you and say some sh*t like, "damn babe, your butt looks bigger (smaller), what you been doing?". This will prompt her to turn around and have her ass in your face. Now, unless she's on her period, I say, just do some sneak sh*t like, idk, start pulling down her- whatever she's wearing and start kissing her ass...men like kissing ass. Bend her over, gently, and if she's wearing panties, pull them suckas to the side, if not, just stick your tongue in, slowwwly. The spontaneity mixed with the pleasure will not only have have her wet, but, cummin' like crazy! Tell her to look back at you while you're eating it...women love lookin' back at it. Your goal is to make sure your sucking on those lips and licking that clit, like it's a cup or pudding or jell-o or whatever it is, that you like.

Let Her Ride Your Face:

This is my personal favorite, why? Because there's nothing like a woman who THINKS she's in control when in reality...she isn't. Some men don't like this sh*t but will two-step they ass out the shower and Electric Slide their penis, into the mouth of their sleeping partner. Aside from rocking a beard; a woman's vagina is one of the sexiest things a man could have on his face. Y'all chillen', layin' around and she get that "itch", don't go down to her, tell her to come up to you! Whisper in her ear, "bae, put that p****, on my face! (Kevin Hart voice)". You know how quick she'll hop on your face? The goal is to make sure she's relaxed, why? Because if she's stiff, her weight will f*** things up and if you thought Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown ass ain't no know how to breathe with no air...yo ass will surely soon find out! Take your time tho. Grab her ass, palm it, smack it, grab her breast, hell, rub your fingers over her wetness, dip'em in your mouth, and play with her nipples, while grabbing on her ass, while eating her out, AT THE SAME DAMN TIME! Your goal is to make her cum so you can slurp all them juices out and if that don't work...

Use a Toy:

Some of you dudes will read this and think, "yo that's gay!". Everything ain't for everybody, I understand that. I also understand that, sometimes, you gotta do a lil' extra and be willing to spice sh*t up. You know how that white guy was looking for something to make his "party pop off" in that Beats Blue Pill commercial? Same applies to sex: use one of her toys (or suggest that she buy one), so that y'all "party" pops off! You can use a dildo, rabbit, or a vibrator to help assist you eat the p****, pick your poison. I'm not telling you to use this as a crutch nor am I suggesting you use one on every girl your encounter (unless they all happen to like that s***) nor am I suggesting that YOU BUY ONE but if you have a long time GF or you're married, I say: fu** it, throw ambition to the wind and get it poppin! If you use a vibrator for instance: allow the vibrator to stimulate her clit, while your tongue, works her insides. A dildo can be used to penetrate her WHILE you work on her clit. Lastly, a rabbit...a rabbit usually has dual capabilities, so, the two of you (toy and tongue) can switch off periodically. Hell, you can even let her suck on the dildo, if you want or "toss her salad" and let the dildo penetrate her vagina and speaking of "tossin her salad"...

Lamborghini Her Doors:

You know how the doors go up on a Lamborghini, that's how her legs should go up when you're tossing her salad. I know y'all like, "whaaatttt!?!?" but let me tell you:

she (claps hands) will (claps hands) go (claps hands) f***in (claps hands) crazy (claps hands) when you stick (claps hands) your (claps hands) tongue (claps hands) in her ass!

It's not for everybody, I understand that. Some women enjoy it, not all the time...but they enjoy it. Before you even consider doing it men:

MAKE SURE EVERYTHING IS CLEAN!

(same goes for the kitty cat)

I'm not an ass eating specialist but I know if you start eating her out and wet your index finger up and slide it in her "tunnel of love" and then roll your tongue upwards and then use two other fingers to pleasure her...s**t will get real!

Get on Your Knees:

"You got a job, you got degrees/but so wat playa, get on yo kneeeess!" (In my Khia voice...you know, the chick from "My Neck, My Back").

Ima keep it alll the way real on this one: when you're on your knees and she's just looking at you, look her dead in the eye and keep doing what you're doing! Women love to have a submissive (and aggressive) guy when it comes down to sex. The submissiveness comes from you being on your knees, giving her all your attention. The aggressiveness comes from when your eating her and talking sh*t to her at the same time,

"You like that shit right?!"

"Hold dem legs, HOLD DEM LEGS!"

"Put ya hand on the back of my head!"

"Push me deeper in that s***!"

You know, shit like that. Women like when you take charge fellas. The goal is to make her cum to the point where her legs shake and she's just cursing you out,

"You ain't shit, you know that!! I was suppose to go out to the club!"

Oh no b****, you ain't goin nowhere!

Not all men are into eating p**** but to the ones who are; I salute you! Now that I think about it, some of you dudes need to read this one and part 1 because you might THINK you're doing something...but you're not. If you expect a woman to put her mouth...on and or around your penis, you should most definitely, put your tongue and lips...in and or around her vagina. The key is to keep her thinking, "is he going suck for x amount mins? Is he gonna lick my clit in circles or up and down?". Keep her on her toes! Use them fingers and spread them lips apart while you let her suck on your other fingers. Suck on her clit, but not too hard. Mix up your licking speeds. Nibble on her clit as well, but make sure you don't Vampire Diaries/True Blood her p****! Make, love, to, her, vagina, fellas; she'll appreciate it, as well as her vagina. Pin her ass on the bed and put her legs back and start from her naval and work your way down...

Never mind.

@renaissance_brotha_